Dream Man

The time has come
To meet the one
I’ve been ogling for weeks.
I crimped my lashes
And polished my glasses
And funded the best boutiques.

The taxi is here
And I’ve checked my rear
Doesn’t look too big in this.
I’ve got my phone
And the bus-fare home
In case he tries more than a kiss.

It’s been so long
Since I’ve worn a thong
I’m not sure it’s the right way round!
And my rather modest pair
Are spilling everywhere
Thanks to “Push-Up and Astound”.

I read up on the news
Whilst trying on shoes
In the hope that I could impress
But in all honesty,
World economy,
Was more than I could digest.

The taxi is slowing
I can feel my face glowing
As I see him standing there
I pay the driver
With a tatty old fiver
And climb out, trying not to stare.

I hold out my hand
Whilst trying to stand
Upright in 4 inch heels
“Pleased to meet you at last”
I say as he grasped
My hand with a grip of steel.

“The pleasure’s all mine,
“Come let us dine”
And he shows me the table he’s booked
The roses are red
The wine full-bodied
And now I am definitely hooked.

He sits opposite me
His knee on my knee
My heart it pounds out a tune
Oysters are ordered
I think him quite forward
But still I fall into a swoon.

He remains charming throughout
He calms all my doubts
The effort was all worth while
At the end of the evening
I’m almost believing
We will soon walk down the aisle.

But three weeks have passed
And he still hasn’t asked
To meet with me again
The agency said
I must have misread
The contract they had me sign.

Please check the small print
You’ll see there’s a hint
Our Escorts are pro’s to the end
They will flatter and fawn
And try not to yawn
But only whilst you’re willing to spend!

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